Sexually Awakened PETA President Announces That Being Kept In A Tiny Cage All Day Actually Sounds Hot As Hell

NORFOLK, VA—In an unexpected change of course that sent shockwaves across the animal-rights-activist community, a sudden sexual awakening experienced by PETA president Ingrid Newkirk led to her announcement Monday that being kept in a tiny cage all day “actually sounds hot as hell.” “This is obviously a new…

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